Laugh a little
We all receive jokes by email, but I've found a very large collection of Jewish jokes at a website called aWordInYourEye.com. That website's creator, David Minkoff, has given permission for jokes on his website to be reproduced here.
Unless otherwise stated, all content shown here is:
From awordinyoureye.com. Copyright © 2001-2015 David Minkoff
The Missing Wife
Morris goes into a police station to report that his wife Rebecca is missing.
Morris: "I've lost my wife. She went shopping yesterday and has still not come home."
Sergeant: "What is her height, sir?"
Morris: "I think it's 5 foot something."
Sergeant: "And what about her build?"
Morris: She's not slim, but nor is she really fat."
Sergeant: "What colour are her eyes sir?"
Morris: "I don't know, I've never really noticed."
Sergeant: "And what about the colour of her hair?"
Morris: "It changes according to the season and what hairdresser she goes to."
Sergeant: "What clothes was she wearing when you last saw her?"
Morris: "I think she was wearing either a blue dress or else blue jeans. I don't remember exactly."
Sergeant: "Did she go shopping by car?"
Morris: "Yes she did."
Sergeant: "And what is the make of the car?"
Morris: "It's a high performance 560 HP Audi in a very special silver grey metallic paint. It has 8-speed paddle-shift automatic transmission and a 6.35 litre V12 engine generating at least 460 HP. It has the Z51 Super Performance Package; larger than normal alloy wheels; GT bucket seats; Satellite Navigation with world-wide coverage, and Direct Injection. It also unfortunately has a very thin scratch on the front left door. And .......... "
At this point, Morris starts to cry.
Sergeant: "Don't worry sir.......We'll find your car."