Laugh a little

A grave story

David's friends, Moshe and Abe, persuade him to join them in a night out in Golders Green, and they take him to the "The Toches Arms" pub. But David is not used to drinking and falls asleep after only three pints of beer. So, tightly holding on to him, Moshe and Abe start walking David to their car.

But after a few minutes of walking, Moshe and Abe decide, in their somewhat shikker state, that it would be a laugh to take David to a cemetery and put him on top of a gravestone to sleep it off. And that is what they do.

At 6am next morning, David wakes up and finds himself on his own, laying on top of a grave. Very worried, he looks up to heaven and says, "As ich laib, vos tee ich do?  Odder as ich laib nisht fer vus daff ich gayen pishen?"

toches: The rear end, bottom, buttocks
shikker: drunk
As ich laib, vos tee ich do? Odder as ich laib nisht fer vus daff ich gayen pishen?: If I am alive, what am I doing here? If I am not alive, why do I need to have a pee?

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