Laugh a little
We all receive jokes by email, but I've found a very large collection of Jewish jokes at a website called aWordInYourEye.com. That website's creator, David Minkoff, has given permission for jokes on his website to be reproduced here.
Unless otherwise stated, all content shown here is:
From www.awordinyoureye.com. Copyright © 2001-2017 David Minkoff
Lokshen soup
Christian, a very wealthy married man, has been having a secret affair with Naomi for a number of years. But then one night, out of the blue, Naomi says to him, "I'm pregnant, Christian."
He is devastated. There is no way he wants to ruin his reputation or his existing marriage. So after a short period of thinking on his part, he says to Naomi, "OK Naomi, I've decided what to do. You're Jewish and you've told me many times that you've always wanted to go to Israel. So here's my deal. I'll pay you $30,000 to go to Israel to have your baby in secret. And not only that. If you then decide to stay in Israel to raise your child, I'll pay you a further $5,000 every month as child support until your baby reaches the age of 16. What do you think of that?"
After a few minutes, Naomi replies, "OK, Christian. It's a deal. But how will you know when the baby is born?"
"It's important you remain discreet about this, Naomi," he replies, "so why don't you send me a postcard and write lokshen on the back. As soon as I receive this message, I'll arrange for child support to begin."
One day, 9 months later, Christian returns home from work to find his wife very confused. "What's the matter darling?" he asks her.
"Oh it's just that you received this very odd postcard this morning from Israel," she replies, handing him the card.
Christian looks at the card, turns it over, and goes absolutely white. On the back of the card was written the following:
"lokshen, lokshen, lokshen, and lokshen. 2 with knaydlach, 2 without. Please send extra soup."
He is devastated. There is no way he wants to ruin his reputation or his existing marriage. So after a short period of thinking on his part, he says to Naomi, "OK Naomi, I've decided what to do. You're Jewish and you've told me many times that you've always wanted to go to Israel. So here's my deal. I'll pay you $30,000 to go to Israel to have your baby in secret. And not only that. If you then decide to stay in Israel to raise your child, I'll pay you a further $5,000 every month as child support until your baby reaches the age of 16. What do you think of that?"
After a few minutes, Naomi replies, "OK, Christian. It's a deal. But how will you know when the baby is born?"
"It's important you remain discreet about this, Naomi," he replies, "so why don't you send me a postcard and write lokshen on the back. As soon as I receive this message, I'll arrange for child support to begin."
One day, 9 months later, Christian returns home from work to find his wife very confused. "What's the matter darling?" he asks her.
"Oh it's just that you received this very odd postcard this morning from Israel," she replies, handing him the card.
Christian looks at the card, turns it over, and goes absolutely white. On the back of the card was written the following:
"lokshen, lokshen, lokshen, and lokshen. 2 with knaydlach, 2 without. Please send extra soup."
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